Carter Update

Wow, I can't believe it's been 5 1/2 weeks since our little guy was born. This week has been full of ups and downs, but thankfully more ups. It started Sunday afternoon. We got home from church and I went over to the hospital. Carter had all of a sudden been eating a ton of food. He takes around 60cc's in his bottle but was taking well over 70 all morning. He had been sad and refluxy throughout as well, but he was eating. Great! I started feeding him and he was chugging it. He was eating it SO fast and it was almost too fast. I had to keep tipping the bottle out of his mouth so he could catch up. He cried a lot and arched his back in pain as he refluxed. Poor baby. It's so hard to watch that. The nurse was excited that he was eating and so was I. But for some reason I felt like something wasn't right. I talked to his nurse about how bad he has been lately with reflux. She mentioned the possibility of him maybe trying a little bit of formula to see if it helps him. She said I should bring it up to the doctor on Monday.

I left the hospital excited but not. I knew he was doing so much better all of a sudden, but something just didn't feel right. I called Tyson and told him the news. He was really excited. Then I told him my feelings of uneasiness. I didn't think too much more of it and that I just shouldn't get my hopes up about anything. That had to have been why I was feeling that way.

Tyson's parents and sister, Tacie, came to town that afternoon and Tyson took them to see Carter. Tacie just loved him and got to hold him. It makes us feel so good when our family members are so excited to see and hold him. There was a doctor there who knew how well he had done that day. He told Tyson that Carter could probably have his feeding tube out to see how he does. It was an exciting thought, but the nurse didn't think it was a good idea. When Tyson told me about that I agreed with the nurse, and that same weird feeling came back to me that I'd had earlier.

By the time they got back his brother, Dustin, and his family were at our apartment. That night I took Erika to the NICU to see Carter. We got there around 9:00 and Erika got to hold him. We talked about how different he looks since she held him last and how he looks great. He had already eaten through his feeding tube by the time we got there so we just held him. Erika held him first then we traded. At around 11:30ish I was holding him and his stats dropped. His little face started turning blue and it freaked me out. I rubbed his head and back to get him to snap out of it...but nothing. The nurse took him from me and put him in his bed. She and the other nurse were trying to help him breathe-holding oxygen right up against his face and moving him around. It took some time to get him back where he should be. I sat there crying as I watched all of this happening. During that time I had two thoughts: "Please let him be ok" and "I'm so sick of all of this". Erika sat there with me with tears in her eyes as well. I was so glad she was there with me. It was nice to have that support and someone to talk to on the way back to the apartment. Before we left, the nurse told us that he probably had too big of a day and worked way too hard with his food all day. He probably ate way too much and wore himself out hard. My bad feeling earlier had been validated with all of this happening.

We got home and I told Tyson what had happened. He was so bummed and I felt bad. He had gotten his hopes up about what the doctor had said earlier about Carter's feeding tube. We were both so sad, knowing that Carter's episode bought him at least another week in the NICU.

I hardly slept that night because I was so worried about Carter. The next morning I called the NICU to check on him. It was decided that Carter needed some thicker food so he was started on Enfamil AR (added rice). The nurse said he was doing really well on it. Because it is thicker, it doesn't come up as easily as milk does, if at all. I was so happy to hear that! We went to Lagoon with Tyson's family that day and came home, looked at a house for rent, then I went to the hospital. His nurse told me when I got there that he had done really well all day and had taken all of his bottles. No gavaging at all! The formula seemed to be working really well. They would be starting mixing milk back into his bottles on Wednesday morning.

On Tuesday morning I called the NICU to have them adjust his bed under the webcam. My mom was about to leave for girls camp and wanted to see him one more time before she left. She moved his little bed and told me how he ate all of his bottles all night and hasn't had an episode of stats dropping since Sunday night. About six hours later she called me to see if I would be in to feed him during the day. I said no because I had Brycen. I asked how Carter was doing since I talked to her last and she said he was awesome. The formula was making a radical difference in him and was helping big time. All afternoon I thought about how well he was doing and how they would be putting milk back in his bottles soon. I felt weird about that. If he was doing so well, I wasn't sure I wanted them changing things up again.

Tyson went to the NICU to hold Carter and got there just in time to feed him the last half of his bottle. He drank it well. He talked to Carter's nurse about the possibility of not adding the milk in his bottle and she said that was perfectly fine. He said he'd talk to me more about it then I would come in with my decision. When he got home we talked about it and decided not to add the milk. We didn't see a point. He's doing so well on this formula and the milk is what's making his reflux so bad. If we want to add milk in later we will. But for now, we just want our baby home. It's pretty ironic that the thing that's so wonderful for the babies was actually setting my baby back. He's not lactose intolerant though. The milk is just a lot thinner and it makes his stomach acid worse. It comes up way too easily. He'll be able to eventually have it and I'll add what I have stored in the freezer back into his bottles. But for now we're gladly sticking with the formula.

I came to the NICU last night to find this wonderful sight:

 No more feeding tube!!

He has done so well with his feedings that he earned it being taken out. We're so proud!! I haven't seen his face like this since the day he was born. He's had tubes attached to him ever since. The nurse was feeding him the last half of his bottle when I got there so I finished feeding him, just like Tyson did earlier. It was so wonderful seeing him eat without that pesky feeding tube in his nose!

 

I let the nurse know about our decision to just do the formula and she thought it was a good idea. There's no point in keeping him in the hospital longer just to test out if he can handle milk. I've never been one to believe that breast milk is the only thing I can give my babies anyway so this was a very easy decision for me. No matter how good that breast milk is for him, it's obviously doing more harm than good right now. It is the best nutrition he can receive, yes. But it's just too thin and hard on his tummy. Yes, we could add thickener to it. But it's still the milk that's hard on him right now. Not worth a longer NICU stay! I'll talk the formula!

On Sunday I hesitantly asked the nurse what I should do if I decide to stop pumping. Tyson and I had been talking about it and I'm afraid of what it's going to be like when I'm trying to pump and take care of two kids. I haven't been able to nurse Carter and I'd have to wait till he's about 3 months old to try it. It scared me to think about the time between now and then where I'd have a baby and a two year old at home while trying to pump. The nurse's response made me feel so much better. She said that obviously I wouldn't be able to pump for much longer after the baby is home. It just takes way too much time if I'm not nursing. If I was just nursing it would be a completely different story. She was so great and told me I could keep pumping if I wanted to try, but most of the moms who strictly pump have a hard time with it-emotionally and physically. That confirmed it for me. Last night I decided to stop with the pump all together. Carter isn't needing the milk right now so I'm storing everything I have pumped and will give it to him a little bit in bottles later. I feel great about this decision and I'm just so happy that we've gotten to the bottom of Carter's reflux issues. He's still taking Prevacid for it as well, but taking the milk out all together has made a night and day difference.

We're nearing the end of Carter's NICU journey! He hasn't had an incident since Sunday, but he did have an incident. That automatically bought him a week in the NICU so he's not coming home till at least Sunday. But it could also be a lot longer than that, depending on how the rest of the week goes. We're just so happy that he's making so much progress. His reflux issues are what's been making all the problems lately. We're so happy that we've gotten that figured out! Time to move on and get this baby home!