Sometimes a person just needs to speak what's on their mind. That's pretty much what I'm doing for this post. And it's really not a big deal, I just wanted to get some thoughts out there.
I don't understand why people feel the need to justify purchases. I've noticed that when people buy something for themselves that probably wasn't the cheapest thing they end up saying something like this (and I'm totally making this up): "We just got ourselves iphones and they're really cool" followed by "but we got a really good deal on them, so we didn't pay as much as they originally cost." The situation is that these people got new iphones. Great! That is pretty cool. It's the part after the announcement of their new phones that bugs-the part where they justify getting the phone and make sure they let people know that they didn't spend as much money as one would think.
So the question is, why do some of us feel like we have to explain why we bought something? Or why do we feel like we shouldn't have bought something, worried about what others are going to think? And maybe that was a bad example, but I've recently found myself stuck in a situation like this when I got Tyson a new point-and-shoot camera. I felt like with the person I was talking to I needed to make it known that the camera was on sale and he needed a new one. I'm totally guilty. But why should I be ashamed of what I've just bought?
The way I see it is that we all have the freedom to do what we want with our money. If I want to go buy a new TV then I'm going to go buy a new TV. Even if that means I'm going to put the purchase on my Best Buy card. It doesn't matter. And I shouldn't care what others think when I do buy that TV.
Which brings me to my next point: It's great to make all the purchases we want and all, but it's probably not the best idea to tell people you can't pay for things then go buy an iMac computer. That's when people buying stuff really bugs. Or if a person says they can't pay for a certain thing (like a bill or a Mother's Day gift) because they don't have money, but they have no problem dropping $500 on something else. That's when it looks bad. Obviously they have money. Which is great! Embrace that. They just need to admit that they don't want to spend the money on things like Mother's Day. And there's nothing wrong with that. Some people just don't like giving gifts. It's better to admit it than to play the poor or frugal card. It's just annoying and it looks bad. Plus people have been feeling bad for these "poor" people and try to help them out, then the "poor" people go buy something expensive and unnecessary. It's a little insulting.
But there are also those that obviously don't have money, and they won't accept help or some of their bills being paid. I think that is admirable.
Anyway, now that I've spoken my mind I'm just waiting for the torches and picket signs (hopefully that won't happen!). I just want people to realize that it's ok to spend money. There's nothing wrong with spending money if you have it or can pay off a card later. People should be proud of their new purchases. And admit that they have the ability to pay for stuff! It's exciting to buy new stuff, and it's totally ok to be happy for yourself. Even if others give you crap for buying it.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
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7 comments:
We are grown-ups, afterall!
I saw a thing on TV about the most common everyday lies women and men say. The one for men was "I'm on my way home" and the one for women was, "I got it on sale."
I do admit, most of what I buy is onsale, but things like our cruise... not so much!
Great post.
I think people are way too concerned with how others spend their money/live their lives. If I want to buy something, and I have the money to do it- I'm gonna get it and enjoy it- after all, why the heck do I work so hard if I don't enjoy my life? Haha.
I figure if it doesn't affect me or my life- it's not my problem...so enjoy your dang tv/trips/toys/whatever is it you want to buy! :)
There will always be judgemental people, no matter the situation- and honestly, the only people who REALLY know what situation you're in money wise are you and your hubby- so heck with it, do whatever you feel comfortable doing!
I really like your post, I find myself always feeling like I have to justify my purchases, and I don't know why. It really isn't anyone elses business how I spend my money. I suppose if I were borrowing someone elses money it would be different or claiming poverty it would be different. Your post really made me think, and I'm not going to justify my purchases anymore. It really got me thinking
I agree with you in so many ways. I have actually been dealing with some people in my life that buy all kinds of "toys" (4 wheelers, boat, trailer etc) but then turn around and tell us that they don't have enough money to buy there kids PJ's for the winter. I have a really hard time with things like that because how can you say that when you have all these "toys" Do what you want with your money but don't come and ask for help or tell me you don't have money to get your kids things when you spent it all on things that you maybe should not have.
I also think that there are some people that will go and buy a TV or an Iphone like you have said and they will go and tell it to the world like "look at me I'm better then you" I agree that people can go and do what they want with there money but Some people need to learn to not rub it in peoples faces. I also think they need to teach there children that as well. I have come across some kids before that are VERY spoiled and there parents have not taught them that they don't need to go around rubbing it in there friends and families faces that they got all these new toys and clothes and things just becasue.
I like your post alot you could really have a got debate about this I would love to hear what some of these "kind of people" think about this. It would be interesting to see if they would say it's totally fine to let your kids and themselves tell people about all there stuff or if they would say something different.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts I love it when you do. :)
Some people just don't understand money. Or snobbiness. Or something. I think it has a lot to do with how you grew up. Some people really think they NEED that new flat screen TV, even if they can't afford it and have tons of debt.
Kids will be kids and they like to brag about things. Unfortunately money comes along with that. I hope parents are trying to teach them that it's not right, though. But kids are just mean sometimes, so they will try to make you feel bad that you don't have the nicest clothes or gaming system. Can you tell I grew up without a ton of money?
I think people justify their purchases because they are trying to say they are responsible. Like, "I wouldn't just go pay retail price for that iPhone." Or they just feel guilty and stupid that they wasted so much money on something. (Like the time I spent $100 on MAC make-up right after I graduated and started working my full-time job because I felt like I could afford it. It ate at me for a week and I eventually returned $70 worth. I just knew it was a stupid buy, even if I had some money). I know I pull the "it was on sale!" line a lot, but only to my husband :) And it's always true.
Honestly, I hate money. I hate that it has such an affect on everyone's lives. I've thought that ever since highschool when a group of us would want to go to a movie but one of my friends didn't have any money for it. What were we supposed to do? Tell her to go home, then? Pay for her? It's annoying. It's also annoying that some people think they need to make sure everyone knows that they have money (or at least that it looks like they have money because they have nice things even if it means they are deep in debt.)
It would be nice if everyone understood money and debt. Then maybe it wouldn't be such a competitive type thing. That's why I'm glad the church talks about finances so often. Sorry for the super long comment. But hey, you opened it up for discussion, right?
PS- As far as you and Tyson go, I think it's sweet that you guys get each other such fun gifts for the different holidays. You do it (I assume) to celebrate, to make the holiday special, and because you know that he will like it. It doesn't matter if things are on sale or not. (But if you do find awesome deals on things, you should share just because some other people might want to go get one of their own :))
LOOOOVE your post. I agreed with every word. Thanks for sharing. Love you Al!
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