March Came In Like a Lion and a Lamb

And I'm not talking about the weather this time. (Ever heard that phrase, "March came in like a lion and out like a lamb"?) Anyway, it was quite a day for us on this first day of March. We had a couple of different lion and lamb experiences today:

The lion of it all was that Tyson and I decided it is time for me to stop working. I went to work today and felt pretty crappy. I took two tables and was grateful I didn't have more. The dizziness and lightheaded feelings kept happening and I just couldn't get food and water in me fast enough. I felt frustrated. I did, however, teach a server training class and it felt really good to sit down. I get paid to teach classes so that felt like an accomplishment (and one of the lambs for the day). That is one thing I will still be able to do before the baby comes. It doesn't involved running around. I came home discouraged. When Tyson came home we had a talk. And we both knew the right thing was for me to stop working. I'm almost 31 weeks pregnant, so it seems about that time anyway to take it easy.

Another lamb was knowing that we are making the right decision. I've always prayed for the ability to listen to my body and know when I need to pull back. And I think today was one of the many times where that prayer was answered. I could just tell when I was at work that I shouldn't be there. I'm grateful to know and recognize those feelings.

We were also blessed with another little lamb in the form of our car insurance. Our car insurance went down - woo hoo! That is a huge blessing and a few dollars we can save every month. I love the lamb moments in my life. They make it easier to deal with the lion moments.

I've really appreciated having the job I've had for this long. And even though I'm pretty bummed that I can't do it anymore as long as I'm pregnant, I know I have a place to return whenever I feel ready. What a blessing!

image via intercontinentalcry.org

A New Outlook

This week has been a struggle. Not only did having a seizure take a lot out of me physically, I'm also mentally and emotionally drained. I've had to make a lot of changes in my daily habits that have been a challenge. And I still don't feel like myself. The way I feel phsyically has been affecting my ability to work, which weighs heavy on my mind.

I had to give my shift up for today because of how dizzy and lightheaded I've felt since yesterday morning. It's especially frustrating because I don't know what to do about it or how to fix it. After Tyson left for work this morning I decided to watch one of my many recorded re-runs of Oprah. This one in particular was the episode with Celine Dion and the Canadian Tenors. Every time I watch their performance on this episode I just cry! It is so touching. On this particular occasion I realized how happy it was making me feel to hear them sing. I started thinking about all the wonderful things in my life and the many more to come. I couldn't help but get emotional.

And from this I've decided to change my attitude. This week has been so rough and frustrating. But I know that everything is going to be ok and work out the way it's supposed to work out. When we ask for the answers we don't ever seem to get them when and how we want. But I know that someday I will realize the blessings that will eventually come out of all that has been happening. I know that we're never alone. That thought is extremely comforting. I'm just so happy for this little baby who will be joining us in just a couple of months. He has already brought joy into so many lives. I know things will get better for Tyson and I. If I think about all the good things, they somehow weigh out the bad. I feel lucky to be living the life I live. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Bella

Tyson and I had a little house guest this last weekend. Her name is

Bella

and she is Aaron and Britney's kitty.

She was fun to have around for a few days!

Thanks for coming over to play, Bella!

Never a Dull Moment at Walmart

Every now and then I witness something really random and/or rediculous at Walmart. First I went to lunch with Amber and Mom at Carino's. I had to order something meaty to help with my iron issue. So chicken scaloppini it was. It was fun to go out with Mom and Amber.

Mom and I went to Walmart right after lunch. When we walked in I decided I needed to use the restroom. Mom went to the vegetables and I told her I would just find her. So I went into the restroom and got in line behind a woman with a cane, who was behind a mom and her 7-year-oldish daughter and 3-year-oldish son. The mom went in one stall and the kids went in another {which I thought was kind of odd, honestly.} Then someone else came out of another stall. But the woman with the cane was waiting for the large stall. So she told me I could go ahead of her as she went to stand in front of the large stall. Pretty soon I hear a woman come out of the large stall. As she did so the woman with the cane began reprimanding her. It went something like this:

Cane Woman: You shouldn't be using this stall. This stall is only for people who have a hard time getting around...
Other Woman: My apologies, ma'am.

{My thoughts at this point were, "Are you kidding me? Don't you apologize to her! What were you supposed to do, hold it till someone else came out of another stall? Good grief."}

Cane Woman: I've been standing out here waiting on you, and you shouldn't be in there...
Other Woman: My apologies, ma'am.

I was rolling my eyes like crazy and saying things like, "Give me a break," and "Good grief," under my breath. Then in the stall to my left I could hear the two kids. Their mom had just asked them if they were ready yet. This is how that situation went down:

Girl: Almost done, Mom. Wait, Billy don't do that. Billy, don't. Billy...{getting louder}...Billy...Billy!!

Then ~splash~ water everywhere, even under my stall. I had to lift my feet up. This girl hadn't flushed the toilet yet.

Girl: Mom, Billy fell in the toilet.

I couldn't help but laugh. I was so grossed out but at the same time, it was hilarious. Pretty soon I hear the kids come out of the stall and the mom sounding a little angry:

Mom: Are you kidding me?! What were you doing, look at your shirt! We're going to have to buy you a new shirt. Go wash your hands. Better yet, let's find a shower somewhere. What were you thinking?!

Talk about drama. Then I went out to wash my hands, and as I was doing so the woman with the cane came out of the large stall. And out the door she went, not even glancing at the sink that she probably should have washed her hands at. I was grossed out, but couldn't help but laugh. It was all so rediculous! As soon as I found Mom I told her what she had missed. I think she was pretty bummed she missed out on all the excitement ha ha.

Thank you, Walmart, for making life so much more entertaining!

Update

I have to say, the last 24 or so hours have been nothing but up and down. I had a lot of visitors throughout the afternoon and evening {thanks again to all and for all the yummy food!} and I was feeling pretty good. I drank a lot of water and munched the whole time. But it didn't hit me till about 11 pm that I had seizure. And when it did hit me the water works came. And came. And came. I had a hard time sleeping, in fear that I'd have another one and not wake up from it.

I woke up this morning feeling very achy and sore. I've always heard from people who have had seizures that your muscles get super sore from how tense they get during the seizures. I was feeling pretty good and even wrote about it on Facebook. I also decided to call my doctor's office and see if they could get me in today to check on the baby. Just for my own peace of mind. I was put on the schedule for 3:45. At about 10:30 I started going downhill again and felt very dizzy and tired. I couldn't believe the fatigue. It was almost overwhelming. I called Tyson {who had been checking up on me throughout the morning} and he made the plan to come home after visiting one more patient. All day today I have been drinking plenty of water and juice and munching on different foods. It made me feel better, but I still was feeling yucky. Naturally I was getting worried and anxious to get to the doctor's.

The time finally arrived and I went to the doctor's with Tyson. I ran into my friend Ashley {who is 39 weeks and being induced Thursday - so fun!}. I was doing great with my emotions till I talked to her. Of course I started crying and struggled to get it under control. Finally my name was called. I saw Scott today and he asked me how I was doing. Through the tears I explained my frustrations of what has been going on and all my fears...I'm sure I was quite the sight. But he measured my stomach and listened to the baby's heart rate before we got into the seizure and everything was great. He was even laughing because the baby was kicking so hard. Such a great feeling! Then he asked us to tell him about the seizure incident to make sure he knew everything. He was happy to know that I was able to stay in my chair while it was happening. Then he asked me about my glucose test and how my numbers were. I let him know about my iron being low, but everything else was fine. It was then that he decided that the lack of iron has also played a role in this mess of mine. My crazy work hours have kept me from eating as often as I should and getting enough fluids. And the fact that I don't drink enough on my own didn't help things either.

So the deal has been sealed: I'm iron deficient. I'll be starting an iron supplement and need to get as many fluids as I can. I also need to eat more during work. And all you servers out there know how hard that is! So it's going to be interesting. I'm just glad we know what to do about all this and that the baby is still doing ok. Not exactly how I wanted to learn, but I guess the hard way is better than no way at all!

And thanks for all your comments and all the concern! I have such awesome friends and family who care about me. You're the best!

The Seizure

This morning I got up for church and got ready like I would on any other Sunday. Our ward starts at 11:00 so I ate breakfast at about 9:00. Right before I left I grabbed a plastic baggy and filled it up with Honey Comb cereal. We headed out the door at about 10:35 so Tyson could start the organ prelude for sacrament meeting. The day continued like any other: active primary kids, games and learning...

We only had three little Sunbeams in our class today. All the boys were gone, so we had three of the four girls in our class. The lesson went well ("I Am Grateful for the Day and Night" - I love these lessons!) and the girls had fun learning about the creation of the sun, moon, and stars. We got all the playdoh put away when at about 1:50ish I turned to Tyson and told him I didn't feel well. I figured I just needed to eat something since all I'd had since 9:00 was dry cereal. Very soon after that I started feeling hot, weak, and a little dizzy. I told Tyson we needed to go and that I wasn't feeling very well at all. So he grabbed the role folder and went out to give it to the primary secretary. Right after he left I felt extremely dizzy and the room began to spin. The next thing I knew Tyson was standing above me yelling my name and telling me to wake up. With blurred vision I could see three little faces staring at me. He then took the three girls and walked them over to the classroom next door.

When he came back he said,

"You just had a seizure."

I've never had a seizure before. I was terrified, worried, embarassed...My hands were super sweaty along with my forehead and everywhere else. Tyson said that when he came back into the room after giving the role to the secretary I was slouched in my chair making weird noises and convulsing. I couldn't believe it! Why would I have a seizure?

He helped me out to the car, and all I could think about was how the baby was doing. I was thinking about the worst case scenario-how I would have to go to the hospital and they'd tell me the baby was in distress so they'd have to get him out...What a nightmare. So we got home and I started changing my clothes as Tyson was calling the doctor to see if I needed to go to the hospital. He ended up talking to the PA at my doctor's office (who is also a friend of mine) and told him what happened.

Scott (the PA) told him it sounded like I was lacking in fluids and wasn't getting enough water. But he had never heard of that leading to a seizure. His advice was to most likely go to the hosptial. At this point I was still feeling dizzy. Scott was going to call Dr. Leavitt and would call us right back. Tyson got me water and juice, then Scott quickly returned Tyson's call. Dr. Leavitt told him that I needed to be drinking more water and not going so long without food. He explained how the baby is getting much bigger and requiring a lot more water and oxygen. And I'm also pumping 50% more blood. So if I'm not drinking enough water and eating enough, the baby will take everything he needs and I won't be left with anything. Which was what happened to me. My brain was lacking oxygen because all I had went to the baby, which led to a seizure. I now needed to get plenty of fluids and eat some serious calories to get my blood sugar levels back to where they needed to be. If I have another seizure I need to get right to the hospital. And as far as church and work go, I need to start bringing a water bottle and "real food" like a sandwich or something. Not a baggy of dry cereal.

That was five hours ago. So far I haven't had another seizure and have been drinking a lot of water. Tyson got me something to eat and has been keeping a close eye on me ever since. He's such a great husband!

It was a very scary experience today. I felt bad for Tyson and the girls in our class. But he reassured me that the girls were pretty involved with the conversation during the seizure and didn't notice anything till he started yelling at me. As for him...he's just begging me never to do that again. Apparently I "scared the crap" out of him. I told him I'd do my best not to have another one.

And Baby Miller has been doing just fine. He's been kicking and moving around like usual. What a relief!

My final note is this:

For all you pregnant friends and family out there, make sure you're getting your 8-10 glasses of water a day! They're not kidding when they say that it's important to get enough water. It took a seizure for me to realize that I need to take water more seriously. The baby is going to be getting everything he or she needs whether you're getting enough or not. Good for the baby, yes, but mom needs enough too. And make sure to eat throughout the day. Don't go too long without food! I was dumb to not drink enough water. I hope you all are smarter than I am!

***

{PS I also want to thank all of you who have called and stopped by today after our crazy ordeal! I can't even begin to tell you how much it means to me. You're wonderful!}